Sunday, October 30, 2011

Solving Problems in a Marriage With These Simple Techniques

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Lucille_Patterson]Lucille Patterson
All marriages have problems, so if you are looking for assistance in solving your own marriage problems, it is important to know that you are not alone. When looking at some of the most common problems in all marriages, simple techniques can be done in most cases to stop these problems in their tracks.
Some of the most common problems that couples face in marriage includes money problems, not having enough time for each other, break down of communication, disagreements in child rearing and lack of romance. When you take the advice listed below, you will learn some simple techniques for solving some of these common marital problems.
Refrain from Unfair Fights
No matter which problems in a marriage you may be dealing with, it is important to fight fair. There are going to be disagreements in any relationship and your relationship will be no different, however, you should not become defensive or bring up past discretions or mistakes you think your spouse may have made. Focus only on the present and only on the issue at hand. You should also not be criticizing your spouse at all.
Some fighting and disagreements can be good for a marriage, but fighting unfairly will just bring up bad feelings and negative thoughts towards your spouse. When you fight fair, you open up communication and together, get to the core of what your problems are.
Always Forgive and Forget
Anytime you argue or fight with your spouse you should try to get over it, forgive and forget. During arguments there will be no benefit to bringing up anything that has happened in the past. The argument should be based on the here and now, allowing you both to get your deep feelings about the issue at hand out into the open.
Though some things will be very difficult to forget, you should at least try to focus on forgiveness and moving on from whatever your marital problems are.
Keep it Real
When you are in a marriage, you will need to keep realistic expectations in mind at all times. You should never try to change your spouse nor should you feel like your spouse is trying to change you. Think about this example: If your spouse was messy and didn't pick up after themselves before you got married, you should not expect them to miraculously become a neat freak. They won't change like that and you will only end up disappointed.
Instead of expecting drastic change, consider compromise between the two of you. You cannot change your spouse and you should not expect to. You can talk about things that both of you can do, however, to make some headway into problems in your marriage or annoyances you may have with each other, like picking up after yourselves.
Stop Breaking Promises
If one of the issues in your marriage is trust, or lack thereof, breaking promises will only make it worse. One of the best solutions to this problem is to make more promises and keep them each and every time. Even small promises, like saying "I promise to walk the dog today" can go very far with your spouse, as long as you actually do it!
Keep in mind, that breaking even small promises can be devastating to your relationship especially if trust is currently an issue in your relationship.
Date Each Other Again
One very successful method of solving common problems in a marriage is to re-date your spouse. When you begin dating your spouse again, you will be taken back to where you were when you first fell in love. You will remember how it felt to be together when you first met and you should always talk about how happy and focused you were on the future. Talk about the two of you, not about anyone else. Actually ask your spouse how they are and show them that you care to listen.
Taking this time out for each other can make a huge difference in your marriage.
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Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Solving-Problems-in-a-Marriage-With-These-Simple-Techniques&id=6651062] Solving Problems in a Marriage With These Simple Techniques

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